Encouraging Quotes
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But if you practice meditation, you can stop that "bleeding." Purpose of Buddhism is to go beyond emotions. Even too much happiness can be bad, because the intensity can make you so used to it that when bad things happen, the misery will be that much worse. Infatuation and a Relationship can bring a heartbreak even more painful than the initial joy. That's why Buddhism teaches emotional detachment.
Yes, your question could be interpreted as snarkiness, so I'm glad that you clarify. You've always been polite and tactful.
To answer your question, I've been in Two relationships (Non-matrimonial), and the first relationship began when I was already in my 50s. Both relationships have ended but without any heartbreak at all.
Why? Well, because I've always made it a Buddhist discipline to prevent any intimacy. Because intimacy leads to emotional attachment.
I saw them as not romantic partners but as social partners. The only difference is that they happened to be the opposite gender. As such, they have a different vibration, which I found interesting.
Why I prevented intimacy is because of the Buddhist teaching that too intense an emotion can be destructive. That's why Buddhists who reside in a monastery eat foods that have hardly any spices or even none at all. Because even the spices are considered an emotion, if you know what I mean.
Seabird, I've tried to answer your question as best I could. Feel free to ask more if you like.
To answer your question, I've been in Two relationships (Non-matrimonial), and the first relationship began when I was already in my 50s. Both relationships have ended but without any heartbreak at all.
Why? Well, because I've always made it a Buddhist discipline to prevent any intimacy. Because intimacy leads to emotional attachment.
I saw them as not romantic partners but as social partners. The only difference is that they happened to be the opposite gender. As such, they have a different vibration, which I found interesting.
Why I prevented intimacy is because of the Buddhist teaching that too intense an emotion can be destructive. That's why Buddhists who reside in a monastery eat foods that have hardly any spices or even none at all. Because even the spices are considered an emotion, if you know what I mean.
Seabird, I've tried to answer your question as best I could. Feel free to ask more if you like.
@Winslow . I do have some questions, so thanks for saying it's alright to ask. Are you talking about intimacy as in sex or sex &/or emotional closeness. If I could scour my memory of all this I certainly would do so if such a thing was possible. As far as I can tell, I could be labeled as the 'victim' of a narcissist, though to be clear I have no interest in staying in that sort of box. How would meditation of the sort you refer to here help me, since my marriage relationship was not a of a Buddhist nature/social agreement? I have more questions, but I edited this down to these few.
Yes, it was avoidance of physical, so it was celibacy. But as far as emotional closeness, it depends on what you mean--because even a Brother-Sister connection can be emotionally close, yes? Maybe even more so, due to its sincerity. At least to me it is.
As far as your relationship with the narcissist, there are many who stay in a relationship even though it's abusive in order to prevent loneliness. Evidently their fear of loneliness is stronger than the physical or emotional abuse. So they stay.
At some point then, one has to abandon the relationship. But being alone is alright. I myself live alone and prefer it that way. In solitude, there is always calm.
You asked me how meditation would help an abusive marriage. My answer is that meditation works best when one is alone. Doing it within the bounds of an abusive-type marriage would be way too difficult. My humble opinion.
The best thing is to prevent such an abusive situation in the first place. Meditation would give you warning signs, and meditation would also give you the discipline to abandon that relationship.
As you noted, it is good that you edit/limit your questions to one or two only. Too many at one time can confuse. Besides, we have many more opportunities for further questions.
By the way, the practice of meditation also includes Kyudo which is Zen archery. Entirely different from European archery because this is Buddhist-archery that teaches spirituality. It is practiced here in the USA too.
Here is a brief 4-minute video.
As far as your relationship with the narcissist, there are many who stay in a relationship even though it's abusive in order to prevent loneliness. Evidently their fear of loneliness is stronger than the physical or emotional abuse. So they stay.
At some point then, one has to abandon the relationship. But being alone is alright. I myself live alone and prefer it that way. In solitude, there is always calm.
You asked me how meditation would help an abusive marriage. My answer is that meditation works best when one is alone. Doing it within the bounds of an abusive-type marriage would be way too difficult. My humble opinion.
The best thing is to prevent such an abusive situation in the first place. Meditation would give you warning signs, and meditation would also give you the discipline to abandon that relationship.
As you noted, it is good that you edit/limit your questions to one or two only. Too many at one time can confuse. Besides, we have many more opportunities for further questions.
By the way, the practice of meditation also includes Kyudo which is Zen archery. Entirely different from European archery because this is Buddhist-archery that teaches spirituality. It is practiced here in the USA too.
Here is a brief 4-minute video.
@Winslow, thanks, it's very kind of you to respond like this.
Sincerity is how I live, I am for better or worse an artist through and through, and can't be otherwise.
To clarify, I'm not in house or even the same country as my husband anymore. While I'm living not completely alone I am isolated.
I have to think about what you've told me.
Synchronicity showed up here, in posting the link about archery. I've always been drawn to it.
Sincerity is how I live, I am for better or worse an artist through and through, and can't be otherwise.
To clarify, I'm not in house or even the same country as my husband anymore. While I'm living not completely alone I am isolated.
I have to think about what you've told me.
Synchronicity showed up here, in posting the link about archery. I've always been drawn to it.
