What’s the point anymore

I haven’t posted in an awfully long time but, I am struggling more than i physically can right now. I just am feeling like the world is a better place without me here. I bring no purpose to this world, I wish i could just disappear forever and then return when i am happy. I have struggled with so much in the past year it’s been hard. When I first joined here I was with my ex partner that ended badly this year, he was abusing me and I found the courage to leave but, I have been in hospital too because of him and his actions so it’s been difficult to cope with everything.

I am feeling like I am at breaking point in my life, I am 19 now and I feel like, what is the point? I know many people will say I’m 19 etc it’s not an age to die but, with everything that has happened to me in my life i feel so shit from it. I have no support in my life, yes i have my sister but she has no time for me anymore. I try my best every day to try have some sort of life but, it just isn’t what i was expecting it to be. I have nothing to live for.

I feel like a shit person for not being there for anyone or being able to support anybody in my life. I’m just a selfish person . I wish i could just be set free but i am still stuck here having to live. it’s so incredibly painful it really is.

Hey Jess

I sympathize with you and the headspace that you find yourself in.

It sounds like life is beating the sh!t out of you right now. When we find ourselves in that place it seems like no immediate relief is available. And it’s kinda not.

Every day we have to choose to be strong and hold on with the hope of a brighter day. Your day will come.

Remember that the good/bad days fluctuate. It is normal to revisit the tormenting thought processes. Just don’t let it consume you.

It will get better. And during the time frame that it does learn to appreciate yourself. During times like you’re in now, learn to nurture yourself.

If you feel that you don’t have a purpose, create one. Volunteer sporadically some place ( boys n girls club / animal clinic / nursing home / children’s hospital / DV center etc.) and bring joy to others with your kindness and your smile.

Find a hobby. Take care of a plant which would require you to water it. That is a simpler purpose. Orchids, succulents and cacti 🌵 are very easy to care for.

Find an accountability partner and schedule weekly or biweekly interactions to discuss a topic or book. That would give you something to look forward to.


I wish you all the best in getting through this rough patch.

You are resilient and all the things that you have overcome strengthens you.

You are stronger than you give yourself credit for. You can share your survival story with others who may be currently struggling.

@jess♡
Sorry things are so bad for you but it doesnt sound like your the problem to your problems, so eliminating what you think is the problem, that is you, isn't going to do any good, as you will just be eliminating the only solution you have, that is you. Make sense?

Have you considered forming one equal relationship with another person? do you have any equal relationships with another person?

What I mean is a relationship of equal position, not like your ex partner who sounds like he thought he was superior to you. It doesn't need to be equal in terms of age or similar people. Someone's parents are normally superior, as in I am the parent you are the child. It needs to be someone who will treats you as an equal.

I had someone new start at work and at first the relationship wasn't equal, they were the new person and I treated them like that - not proud of that, but I became self aware and sorted myself out. I had been reading a book on it 'the courage to be disliked' (I recommend it), so the book helps me see these things. I treated them as an equal and they me and we get on okay. He's not someone Id hang out with, but it doesnt need to be, but its an equal respectful relationship.

I hope you find a way through.

@jess♡ I'm really glad that youre not with your ex-partner anymore. I know that it takes a while to heal from abuse, as I went through the same thing with someone. I almost went to the hospital too. With a crushed larynx (i think that's the word). It probably doesn't feel like it, but this is a healing time for you. Life is full of hardships and I'm rooting for you to get through. Please PM me if you ever want to talk.

@Oizys Moros , @Inastorm , @Lane

Thank you guys for being so kind to me, I haven’t had people who are kind so having you guys be so sweet and thoughtful makes me so grateful.
I appreciate the support and thoughfulness of the replies you gave me, I have read them all throughly.

This is a place where I hope you, and all others, can always find a bit of caring, comfort and support when you need it.

I agree.