Practical Advice Talk me down
- Thread starter Oceanblue99
- Start date
Welcome to SF @Oceanblue99 .
I'm sorry for the reasons that brought you here. We support each other in keeping going with life. We talk/write about how hard it can be to do that, and the differing levels of darkness we're dealing with, pain, trauma, depression, anxiety, and si.
Do you have family and/or close friends?
I'm sorry for the reasons that brought you here. We support each other in keeping going with life. We talk/write about how hard it can be to do that, and the differing levels of darkness we're dealing with, pain, trauma, depression, anxiety, and si.
Do you have family and/or close friends?
The thing I would offer is don’t do anything preemptively. I understand that you are in a place where you are about to lose a lot of things and you can’t imagine how you are going to live life in that new reality. But there is no need to rush doing something, you don’t need to do anything right now, you can wait until you have lost the things and then you can experience that yourself and make a decision then on if you want to live or not, don’t make the decision now based on what might happen and how you might feel.
The other thing I would say is, don’t let your pride effect your choices, it’s easy to do, when we are successful we like to project that image and it can become part of our identity and when we lose that success it can make us feel shame and we feel we will lose face and ourselves if we become unsuccessful. But that isn’t really the case, maybe there will be one or two people who will feel that way about you and others that will drift away when you have less in common but the people that are worth knowing will be there when things change for you and the ones that aren’t, it says more about them than you.
You are not your successes or your failures, they don’t define you, you are the person, the human that makes mistakes and has things go wrong, that is the thing that is worth something. You can still love and hate, you can still do good things or bad, you still have an opportunity to live even if it is not what you thought it would be.
The other thing I would say is, don’t let your pride effect your choices, it’s easy to do, when we are successful we like to project that image and it can become part of our identity and when we lose that success it can make us feel shame and we feel we will lose face and ourselves if we become unsuccessful. But that isn’t really the case, maybe there will be one or two people who will feel that way about you and others that will drift away when you have less in common but the people that are worth knowing will be there when things change for you and the ones that aren’t, it says more about them than you.
You are not your successes or your failures, they don’t define you, you are the person, the human that makes mistakes and has things go wrong, that is the thing that is worth something. You can still love and hate, you can still do good things or bad, you still have an opportunity to live even if it is not what you thought it would be.
I am so sorry to hear what OP is going through, having gone through similar times and going through something similar right now. In 2022 I had house up for sale and was about to lose everything. Some things happened/changed and I managed to buy myself some more time, another couple of years, until about now, when things are really very tough again. I am also working trying to keep existing clients etc happy and keep an income going, despite struggling with reduced work income and increased financial pressures and health issues at the same time.
My suicidal ideation comes a lot from pressure, stress and other factors, it seems like a solution sometimes, a way to make it all go away. But a lot of the time it's about the anticipation and anxiety about how worse I might feel in the future and what might happen. I go from a quiet income day in my business to being in a filthy mess sleeping in some alleyway and getting beaten up by other homeless, and want to kill myself to avoid the anticipated feelings about that. But I have to keep telling myself I am not there yet. Fair enough, if/when I get there, I can re-assess because I will know how I feel. But I don't really know how I will feel, and maybe something will change again. At the moment it's unlikely, but I just keep trying to get through each day. If the worst happens, the suicide option is still there, if I take it now, all options will close automatically. I don't know what might be around the corner, it might be better than I think, no matter how unlikely that seems.
I don't know if it helps OP, and wish you all the best, I'm sorry you are going through this. I appreciate what it's like when you lose hope as I feel hopeless and despairing about half the days at the moment.
My suicidal ideation comes a lot from pressure, stress and other factors, it seems like a solution sometimes, a way to make it all go away. But a lot of the time it's about the anticipation and anxiety about how worse I might feel in the future and what might happen. I go from a quiet income day in my business to being in a filthy mess sleeping in some alleyway and getting beaten up by other homeless, and want to kill myself to avoid the anticipated feelings about that. But I have to keep telling myself I am not there yet. Fair enough, if/when I get there, I can re-assess because I will know how I feel. But I don't really know how I will feel, and maybe something will change again. At the moment it's unlikely, but I just keep trying to get through each day. If the worst happens, the suicide option is still there, if I take it now, all options will close automatically. I don't know what might be around the corner, it might be better than I think, no matter how unlikely that seems.
I don't know if it helps OP, and wish you all the best, I'm sorry you are going through this. I appreciate what it's like when you lose hope as I feel hopeless and despairing about half the days at the moment.