Tidbitsitsybityspider

TY, just wanted to let you know I will reply as soom aa I can as I am getting out of morning stiffness (prefect example why ppl can not be there for others; cause their have things on their own plate) - write back soon 🤗

During holidays I got some lyrica, but the only thing it did was delay a need for oxy on a few ocassions. At other times it gave me anxiety so I uooed my cloni, while one or two times gave me chest pain which I used oxy for. Since the time of detox in Ocriber of last year wjere they fed me 5 mg lisinopril I had chest pains for weeks and used oxy more often and since they were giviing me clonidine everyday at least couole of times a dag, I jad to use lisi opril, the only available BP medication at hime and continued having chest pain amd usin oxy coming agaim to the point of being short om script. In order to salvahe the damage I went streight up to my doctor and told him I will be short on oxy before next sxript due date. I pretty mich set uo an appointment with remarks to be seen for opoid use disorder and medications. Be listend and told me lisinopril gives chest pain and gave me losartan 25 mg in as needed basis since my BP spikes have been mainly due to anxiety and pain. He also prescribed some clonidine and told me to use it along with lyrica if I go into withdrawals but also increased oxy to 15 mg saying pharmacy might fill it prior to my 10 mg scripts since it was a dose change and that is exactly what happened. So tonight for the first time ever I took 15 mg dose and for the first couple of hours it felt weird but it seems it works better and longer than 10 mg dose even though it's from the same manufavturer. The only difference besiedes the dose are the artificial colors in inactive ingridients. I have stopped using laxatives and instead got some Mucinex fiber gummies which seem to do the job even though hard stool is might be unoleasant to oass at times. Now onto cloni, 3 mg a day prescribed so I fluctuated between 2 and 4 mg a day and was able to carry fully into the next script. I was finally able to get to a neurologist and he showed me on the scans where the pain is radiating from but ordered addituonal testing and referral to pain clinic in order to get to the bottom of the things and oreferrably get non'opoid treatment. Damage is degenerative to a degree so not sure how mich it can be fixed. Honestly, I am bit scared to be on 60 mg a day, even though I had icassional days when I took 65. I asked for subotex but PCP does not have a license to prescribe it and whenever increasing oxy I go throgh a period of fear until body-mind adjust to a new dose. Gotta say, Im in a devil's looo. There are no highs, no oleasure, just no pain and I have been in pain for so long that is weird now to not exoerience any. I guess I identified with my illness which in my case proved to be a mistake. I will try not to beat myself too much over it and hopefully self guilt goes away quickly. Onwards!

As of tomorrow I am flat broke. Got enoigh money to pay for two copays for doctors visits. As it haooened in the oast, ceiling with painkiller has been reached. So I will not kill myself but live until this body survives. Backwards!

Oh.. I hope you would be fine.. a hug?

I wish I was not born.

Hi @full
I'm sorry for how you're feeling and no pain relief. I'm in the same boat except I'm restricted to 2 5/325 a day of oxycodone. I've been locked into it by siging a paper when my doc said "pain management clinic then" to find out later he will never increase my dose. It doesn't help me unless I take more than I should. But that's a repeated hell of withdrawal then thank god I finally have them. The problem is tolerance. Even if he put me on more I would develop tolerance and I'd get more pain. Opioids make us more sensitive to pain. I'm not dismissing your pain. I know it's real. Because of high blood pressure I'm not supposed to take ibuprofen but I do. It doesn't stop me from being so irritable I'd bite someone's head off. I've found no other solution. I hope you get what you need

Thank u for understang and good wishes. Kind of tiugh being in your pisition too. I took 600 mv ibuprofen also tgen at niggt will have to coat my stomach wuth carafate. We r screwed anyhiw thats why I dont care anymore uf I am on opiates for the rest of my lufe. Do you mind sharing more about paper you sugned at paun clinic cayse Ive been referred to one for next month?

The paper was at my doctor's office. I said I Ineeded a higher dose for pain. So when he came back with about ,2 or 3 papers I assumed there would be a pain management clinic. There is but they just would inject a med into the sacroiliac joints, that only lasts for 3 months so I refused to go there. If I had gone I would lose my small dose of oxycodone and I wasn't going to give that up for a temporary solution more than an hour's drive away from me

You are needed and wanted even though it seems like lies spoken from a stranger. I don't know how you look like and I pretty much don't care because all humans look pretty according to me but it's the heart that makes someone beautiful. I would be sad if you wouldn't exist. Replying to your threads give me some sense of purpose as if maybe I can help someone even if I am not really helping. It also makes me feel less lonely and at times I see some dear people and myself in you. I want to say something , I hope life becomes gentler to you and I hope you realise that you're so worthy of those good things. And here I am quoting something , one of my favourite quotes - " the world is heartbreaking everyday and the world is beautiful every day and we have to pay attention to both " - unknown
I am glad you exist , I want you to keep existing and I really really want to see you be okay. I wish you the best. True sincere wishes from my heart.

I replied to some of your replies. To some I have not. That is not ignoring but I can understand how you can get that impressuon amd for that pleaae accept my apilogies, did not mean to hurt your feelings or ego.

I see , thankyou for clearing it up. I started assuming perhaps I am making you uncomfortable through my words , almost thought of never reply to your threads again. And then my smart brain lit up lol and I was like it's better to just ask instead of making the mistake I make often to assume. Wish you well btw

I am glad u did ask as well, and as you say to me I say to you and others you matter, all of us matter. You are not making me umcomfortable at all. Trust me, I would tell you. People from Bosnia are very temperamental.