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Ideas & Opinions Entering a monastery

How do you feel about entering a monastery?

  • Yes

  • Maybe, yes

  • Maybe, no

  • No

Results are only viewable after voting.
G

Gard

Well-Known Member
#1
#1
I'm interested in your opinions. If you want, write a comment. If not, just vote, please.

By entering a monastery, I mean a complete change of life, leaving all the old life behind and becoming a monk.

Some tags: @puffymilk @JMG @AmberMarie @Lane @Witty_Sarcasm @seabird @may71 @SushiGirl @LumberJack @Road to Nowhere @KM76710 @MagickLynx @FFurry @Shelly @AvidFan @Mid Night @Inastorm @cymbele @Angie @maybeicanheal @1Lefty @SillyOldBear @1964dodge @IRE1992 @Mid Night @Baywasp @Auri @Licorice @Gonz @HappyKitty @Fbr27 @Kiwi2016 @Reality (feel free to add more)
 
JMG

JMG

Pink Sponge Summer Queen 💖🧽🦉👑
#2
#2
Thanks for the tag Gard. I voted “maybe, no” because that’s probably what it would be for me if I was a guy. It’s something I would maybe consider (depending on how lucky I was with certain kinds of things) but would probably not end up doing it in the end. I just don’t think I would personally be capable of the dedication and commitment such a life would need.

I’m curious about whether this is something you personally are considering possibly doing, but I understand if you prefer not to confirm or deny about that. If you are though then I wish you lots of luck in whatever you decide to do, and I’m sure you’ll do well regardless of what you do :) ;)
 
Licorice

Licorice

Well-Known Member
#5
#5
Thanks for the tag, Gard.

This is something I have considered for myself. I would love to live in a community of women. Two things stop me
1. I treasure my freedom, specifically the freedom to dispose of my time as I see fit. Convents and monasteries operate according to a strict daily schedule built around prayers and communal meals. I don't know if I could get used to that
2. I don't actually believe in Christianity, though I like it as an ethical system. I have often thought I could have been a Buddhist nun.

I have a friend who lives in a Tibetan Buddhist centre. She works for the lama as an editor and archivist. They share communal meals and other things, but she has her own living space and has enough free time to play video games and write fanfiction.

PS I just wanted to add that monasteries are accustomed to people thinking the life might be for them, and then finding out it is not. Becoming a monk is quite a long process, and there are multiple opportunities to back out, no judgement.
 
seabird

seabird

meandering home
SF Supporter
#6
#6
I voted maybe yes, with the assumption you're referring to yourself.

I think your ability to enjoy that sort of life depends on your values and temperament. We don't know you, so it's hard to vote on that kind of thing.

As far as personally, I don't believe in much of what the world's major religions are supposedly based on, and I don't value a hierarchical paternalistic ethos, so I don't think it'd work.

For what it's worth, once spent 2 weeks locked in a hotel room in Australia during a quarantine for Covid, which at the time seemed sort of like being in a monastery. Or jail.

Have you attended a religious retreat, in order to get a sense of things?
 
LumberJack

LumberJack

Huggy Bear 🐻
#8
#8
Have you put a lot of serious thought about this, such as defining your motivations, intentions, and cost-benefit comparison? Have you spoken with any monks about daily life in the monastery, including (probably especially) what are everyday irritations and how do they resolve interpersonal conflicts?
I am suggesting all this because of my own experience. When I was about 19 and trying to find my way in the world, I was considering going into contemplative life. I had idealistic assumptions, though, that everyone would get along in peace and harmony, and spend our days together studying and praying together, with theological conversations after dinner.

This was the image I had created in my mind, but without any knowledge of what monastic life involved. I spoke with the intake advisor (not sure what the term is) and she asked me questions like this. I also read some books by former monks and they shared about monastic life from their perspectives.

My takeaway is that a monastery is not any of the things that I expected, and people are people whether they are wearing jeans or robes. The everyday irritations and disagreements are not diminished inside a cloister. If anything, they are intensified by the nature of living together day after day with the same people.

I was prepared to work with that. I understood that the way to practice patience, for example, is to be inconvenienced and develop patience by working with my impatience. The deal-killer for me was the whole celibacy requirement. I tried really hard to get the hang of this chastity thing, and I am not able to do it. There are people who can attain this, but some cannot.

FWIW, I had not gotten into Buddhism at that age, but I was aware of Catholic monastic orders, and it was my listening to recorded Benedictine chants that drew me towards the monastery. Nonetheless, I also feel like I can practice outside just as well, and be allowed to express my instinctual drives.


Gosh, another lecture. I’m working on that.
 
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AmberMarie

AmberMarie

SF Supporter
#9
#9
i voted "maybe no" because i enjoy some freedom in being allowed to make my own choices n decisions and my own mistakes. i do not do well following someone else's leadership when i find problems within it. The "maybe" part is because i have often wanted to give up total control and the stress that comes with it. Let others make the decisions for once.
 
G

Gard

Well-Known Member
#11
#11
JMG said:
I’m curious about whether this is something you personally are considering possibly doing, but I understand if you prefer not to confirm or deny about that. If you are though then I wish you lots of luck in whatever you decide to do, and I’m sure you’ll do well regardless of what you do :);)
Click to expand...
I am considering this because there have been several people in my life who have advised me to do this. I decided to ask more people.
Thank you *shake

Lane said:
I figure that you can practice religion in other ways.
Click to expand...
Yes, it's true.
Thank you *shake

Fbr27 said:
As far as I know, entering a monastery means you would lose a lot of autonomy and your own private life.

I think most modern people can't really bear that lifestyle so easily.
Click to expand...
People don't really have much autonomy and privacy. We are all dependent on someone. We can't live completely autonomously even if we have a lot of money. I mean, living like hermits. Although the monastery does restrict freedom a bit more than other things. But is there a big difference in what exactly will limit our freedom if limitation is still inevitable?
Thank you *shake

Licorice said:
1. I treasure my freedom, specifically the freedom to dispose of my time as I see fit. Convents and monasteries operate according to a strict daily schedule built around prayers and communal meals. I don't know if I could get used to that
2. I don't actually believe in Christianity, though I like it as an ethical system. I have often thought I could have been a Buddhist nun.
Click to expand...
It is true that monasteries have certain restrictions on freedom. They are not always bad. Maybe even good :) And... I was thinking about a Buddhist monastery too. Their religion is closer to my heart than Christian religion.
Thank you *shake

seabird said:
As far as personally, I don't believe in much of what the world's major religions are supposedly based on, and I don't value a hierarchical paternalistic ethos, so I don't think it'd work.

For what it's worth, once spent 2 weeks locked in a hotel room in Australia during a quarantine for Covid, which at the time seemed sort of like being in a monastery. Or jail.

Have you attended a religious retreat, in order to get a sense of things?
Click to expand...
Either way, the hierarchical paternalistic ethos still exists whether we want it to or not. And I don't think that one day it will cease to exist.
I've seen online religious services in an almost Buddhist monastery. I have some understanding.
Thank you *shake

Baywasp said:
I really like exploring and adventuring, and I would feel really constrained.
Click to expand...
Yeah, I'm attracted to it too. But I don't know what I'm more attracted to yet.
Thank you *shake

LumberJack said:
My takeaway is that a monastery is not any of the things that I expected, and people are people whether they are wearing jeans or robes. The everyday irritations and disagreements are not diminished inside a cloister. If anything, they are intensified by the nature of living together day after day with the same people.
Click to expand...
I guess I'm just looking for a place for me where I feel good surrounded by people.
Thank you *shake
AmberMarie said:
i do not do well following someone else's leadership when i find problems within it.
Click to expand...
I'm having trouble with that too...
Thank you *shake
KM76710 said:
I would vote no because I am too independent minded to put up with the rules and restrictions, plus being agnostic I would probably not be a good fit.
Click to expand...
I don't know if there is a God. But I'd rather believe in him. If it turns out in the end that there is a God, I'm on the plus side. If it turns out that there is no God, I have nothing to lose. These are not my words, I just recall them after what you said about agnosticism.
Thank you *shake
 
may71

may71

mr. may
#12
#12
If you have strong belief in a particular religion, and you don't have feelings of attachment to ordinary life, then it might be a good thing.

Certainly from the Buddhist perspective (I can't really speak authoritatively about it, but just as I understand it) devoting yourself to finding enlightenment and following the spiritual path is the ultimate thing you can do. I think spiritual teachers will say that devoting yourself to this is the only really good use of a precious human life.

So if you're a true believer and you don't mind the changes that a monastic life would bring, I would say go for it.

I'm not sure if you can find Buddhist institutions within Ukraine, or get the sponsorship needed to be a monk, but maybe.
 
G

Gard

Well-Known Member
#13
#13
may71 said:
If you have strong belief in a particular religion, and you don't have feelings of attachment to ordinary life, then it might be a good thing.

Certainly from the Buddhist perspective (I can't really speak authoritatively about it, but just as I understand it) devoting yourself to finding enlightenment and following the spiritual path is the ultimate thing you can do. I think spiritual teachers will say that devoting yourself to this is the only really good use of a precious human life.

So if you're a true believer and you don't mind the changes that a monastic life would bring, I would say go for it.

I'm not sure if you can find Buddhist institutions within Ukraine, or get the sponsorship needed to be a monk, but maybe.
Click to expand...
I asked myself what you have written about. I think I see it as an escape from my current life. Because I'm not feeling very good right now. Suppose I find a monastery in Ukraine or go to India or Tibet altogether after the war is over. But will I like it there? Maybe I will also want to escape later?
I guess I am just looking for a place where I will feel good about myself. I wouldn't go so far as to say I believe very strongly in any religion. But that doesn't mean I don't believe at all. Some I like, some I don't.
Thank you *shake
 
Licorice

Licorice

Well-Known Member
#16
#16
You can always try it and leave if you don't like it.

I searched on quora and found some very enlightening descriptions about what life as a monk is like. You definitely trade the freedom to make your own choices for a life in which the community takes care of you, and in return you serve the community. There is nothing to stop you leaving any time you like, except, of course, that you may lose your community.
 
G

Gard

Well-Known Member
#17
#17
Licorice said:
You can always try it and leave if you don't like it.

I searched on quora and found some very enlightening descriptions about what life as a monk is like. You definitely trade the freedom to make your own choices for a life in which the community takes care of you, and in return you serve the community. There is nothing to stop you leaving any time you like, except, of course, that you may lose your community.
Click to expand...
I definitely have something to think about. Thank you *shake
 
Unenthusiastic

Unenthusiastic

Well-Known Member
#18
#18
Probably not.

Certain aspects of the lifestyle — asceticism, the isolation and quietude typical of such settings — do certainly appeal to me. But I do not hold any strong religious views of any sort, so I could not in good faith dedicate myself towards the sort of strict religious observance required in such a community. I'd simply be living a giant lie.

I suspect persons with strong preexisting religious convictions would be more inclined to vote positively.
 
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G

Gard

Well-Known Member
#19
#19
Unenthusiastic said:
Probably not.

Certain aspects of the lifestyle — asceticism, the isolation and quietude typical of such settings — do certainly appeal to me. But I do not hold any strong religious views of any sort, so I could not in good faith dedicate myself towards the sort of strict religious observance required in such a community. I'd simply be living a giant lie.

I suspect persons with strong preexisting religious convictions would be more inclined to vote positively.
Click to expand...
You are definitely right that religious views matter. Perhaps that is what is holding me back.
 
IRE1992

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#20
#20
Hyphothetically if you did join (Of whatever religion), leaving later and trying to re-enter society would be quite difficult. Thus you'd be almost trapping yourself into a lifestyle.
Also many of the appealling aspects like displine, poverty and reflection could be praticed in a convential life IMO.
 
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