Venting WHY CANT I JUST BE A CIS BOY 😭😭😭😭😭

i feel really uncomfortable i am cringing at former memories.

being in the town where my family lives. and i used to frequent loads as an adolescent and just moved in. it feels so weird to be here now.

my own home is a trigger. i hate the location as well. i am so despsrate to move house.

i feel completely unable to relax when in public and it hurts even more when i see nonchalant cisgender males

i found it very triggering when i was at andy mans club and they described me brave for talking about my mental health

they told me to treat it like an achievement.

i feel like my degree of self disclosure is unusual and that is brain-dysphoric

i find it triggering whenever i see a young man with fluffy hair meanwhile mines thin and flat and straight

i find it extremely distressing how my neighbourhood objectifies me entirely rather than praises me for something un corporal

i also find it upsetting how the more triggered i get the less i behave in an ideal self way (eg reacting too quickly to flee from an uncomfortable situation)

i am having dysphoric thoughts like

i use my phone waaaaay more than everyone else. everyone else barely uses it bec all the internet is now bots. i am so embarrassed.

the more distressed or agitated i am the more uncomfortable images and sounds come to mind.


my tone of voice my hair the way i dress the vocabulary i use what i spend my time doing. all of this defines my identity or self worth. and it all fucking HURTS.

i try to give off the most brain-euphoric impression possible, but no matter what i am constantly read as the opposite of my ideal self 😭

peopl i do not know that add my acc on Facebook or insta objectify me

how do i cope with being misgendered and sexually objectified by strangers that add my account on facebook

Learn not to care what random strangers think of you. They're not experts in you! (They're probably not experts in anything, and if they're passing comments about you in your earshot, they are rude and uncouth as well).

There must be some way you can turn off or block random strangers adding your account on FB. Or just don't have a FB account at all.