I AM SO ESFP I WANT TO DIE

I DONT WANT TO BE ESFP
I DONT WANT TO BE ESFP
I DONT WANT TO BE ESFP
I DONT WANT TO BE ESFP

I identify as a stoic, shy, quiet, athletic, emotionally unavailable, asexual, absent-minded, soft-spoken, daydreamy, low bmi twink with pale skin messy hair baggy clothes
but i am not. my voice is too loud and despsrate i care what ppl think of me i cry too loud i draw attention myself to much even if i dont think i am i spend more time trauma dumping to internet than doing hobbies i never dress speak act behave in a brain euphoric way at all i never get the vibe right i get catcalled and objectified everywhere i go people label me dramatic and attention seeking no one takes my pain seriouslt anymore and i deal with pain by seeking support from others TGATS BRAIN DYSPHORIC, AM SO ESFP 4E3 I WANT TO DJE

I WANT TO DIE I WANT TO DIE

< mod edit - graphic methods > IS 494847474747484774X MORE COMFY THAN ACCEPTING BEING THE FAT UGLY DRAMATIC MONSTER I AM

i was so overwhelmed i called crisis team but it made my pain only worse i am now crying ESFP 4W3 478 STYLE I WANT TO DIE I WANT TO DIE

DECREASE APPETITE, RESPNSOVEINESS TO SURROUNDINGS AND EMOTIONAL AFFWCT
INCREASE DISSOCIATION AND PLEASYRE IN VIDEO GAMES

THE LOUDER I CRY THE FATTER I FEEL

People dont understand how to treat transtypal people. telling me, a calm-identifying person, to calm down will only make the transtypal brain dysphoria even worse. in this instance instead you should respect the transtypal persons dysphoria and boundaries - this is referred to getting their typenouns correct. I really really really wish permanent brain recalibration procedures so transtypal people could typesition to their ideal selves were a thing, this would alleviate soul crushing identity agony forever and ever.

being transtypal is like gender dysphoria except dysphoria over your brain not so much your gender.

Your thoughts are stuck in a loop. I've experienced something similar when I was really low. You're thinking the same obsessive thought again and again and it's holding you back. Since googling "transtypal" only returns posts made by you, it seems like the best way to get better is to try to break the thought loop and distract yourself entirely. I strongly suggest bringing this up with a therapist, as well as trying mindfulness and simply watching videos (not related to the subject you're upset about) and movies/tv shows that you enjoy whenever these thoughts start to bother you.

And if these thoughts about transtypal...ness? return then this forum is here for you to vent and express yourself, but it's a good idea to keep posts related to the same subject in the same thread, rather than making many new threads.

I am often too upset to distract myself

my ideal self is calm or appears calm, has a soft voice, never over reacts, plays a lot of video games, has hobbies MORE than internet, appears unflappable, and is skinny and pale
whenever my voice sounds desperate, whenever i cry loud, whenever i dont play video games or smoke weed because the former is too boring and the latter triggers paranoia i feel overwhelming brain dysphoria

i would rather burn in hell for eternoty 494838377373737363637 degrees celsius than accept being a 2. imagine being a trans man with huge tits, feeling so bad whenever you see flat chested people. thats how i feel. people thinking i want a romantic partner mpre tham anythibg males me want to < mod edit - method >


MAKE ME ANTP 5W7
MAKE ME ANTP 5W7

I WANT TO DIE I WANT TO DIE I WANT TO DIE I DONT WANT TO BE ENNEAGRAM TWO I DONT WANT TO BE ENNEAGRAM TWO

BEING AN EENNAGRAM TWO IS LIKE TJE 202039384747TH LAYER OF HELL

MAKE ME ANUTHING BUT PLEASE

THIZ IZ BEYOND AGONY

I WANT TO BE AN INEXPRESSIVE 5W6 GAMER SO BADLY

DOES ANYONE HERE SPEAK MY LANGUAGE. TYPESE? PLEASE JOIN ME. I AM DESPWRATE TO START A TRANSTYPAL COMMUNITY. ALL KIMDS OF PEOPLE WITH SEVERE BRAIN DYSPHORIA THAT SEVERELY IMPACTS THEIR DAY TO DAY FUNCTIONING AND GIVES THEM UNBEARABLE SUFFERING CAN COME TO THIS CLINIC TO UNDERGO PERMANENT BRAIN RECALIBRATION TO BECOME THE PERSONALITIES THEY IDENTIFY AS, NOT THE ONES THEY FIND UNBEARABLE TO LIVE AS. THERELL BE ALL KINDS OF TRANSTYPAL PEPPLE ALL KINDS - ENTJ IDENTIFYING PEOPLE, 4 IDENTIFYING PEOPLE, 7 IDENTIFYING PEOPLE, LSE IDENTIFYING PEOPLE, ISTJ IDENTIFYING PEOPLE, THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS

dont tell a stoic-identifying person that their crying sounds "hysterical" as that will instantly make their brain dysphoria multiple times worse. don't tell a cocky-identifying person about how insecure they are, that will make their brain dysphoria worse. don't tell a sociable-identifying person to come out of their shell more, that will make their brain dysphoria worse.

i use the internet all day along especially resdit mental health stuff and chat does this mean i am an emotionally needy bf or gf-needy sx2 in denial??? 😭😭😭😭😭

i would rather die than be a

fat
hysterical
phone addicted
irrational
materialistic
relationship-obsessed
sexually objectified
social media
female

(translating into typese, i am NOT generalising saying all esfx is like that. but i personally identify as 5w6)

not being calm enough worsens my brain dysphoria
finding comfort from other people and not hobbies worsens my brain dysphoria
venting in an emotionally uncontrolled manner worsens my brain dysphoria
people laughing at me saying "I love you" to me makes my brain dysphoria UNBEARABLE
crying loudly gives me brain dysphoria
being told "okay" gives me brain dysphoria

i find it crushingly isolating how alone i am as a transtypal person. if i try to make a community no one will take me seriously at all.

i find it so triggering when i see people dress, speak, write, behave or otherwise present in a way more ideal self than i do. it makes me think "theyre out ideal selfing me" "why cant i be like that"