The Role of Society and Media

Society places value on physical appearance, often promoting narrow and unrealistic standards of beauty. These ideals are constantly reinforced by media, movies and television shows to social media influencers and advertising. When we compare ourselves to these often airbrushed and carefully curated images, it’s easy to feel inadequate. This phenomenon is known as “appearance-based social comparison,” and it can significantly impact self-esteem.

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Psychological Factors

Depression itself can distort perception. Negative thinking patterns, which are all-too-common in depression, can lead to an exaggerated sense of personal flaws. This cognitive distortion can make you focus on what you perceive as imperfections and overlook your positive qualities. Low self-esteem, a frequent companion of depression, can also amplify feelings of ugliness. It’s important to recognize that these feelings are part of the condition and not an accurate reflection of reality. Absolutely none of us are perfect, even the ones we see on TV or that we perceive as ‘the perfect 10’.

Personal Insecurities and Past Experiences

Personal history plays a significant role in how we perceive ourselves. Traumatic experiences, such as bullying or criticism about one’s appearance, can leave lasting scars. Sometimes experiences from childhood may have lasting impact that creates years of trauma that leads to internalized negative beliefs about your looks If you’ve been criticized for your appearance in the past, it’s natural to carry those hurtful words with you, allowing them to shape your self-image. This may need to be worked out in a professional setting for the best outcome.

Breaking the Cycle

To start feeling better about yourself, it’s crucial to address both the external and internal factors contributing to these feelings.

1. Challenge Negative Thoughts: Cognitive-behavioral techniques can help reframe negative thoughts. When you catch yourself thinking you’re ugly, try to question that thought. Ask yourself, “Is this really true? What evidence do I have to support this?” Often, you’ll find that these thoughts are not based on reality.
2. Limit Social Media Exposure: Reducing the time spent on social media can lessen the impact of unrealistic beauty standards. Curate your feed to include body-positive accounts and follow people who promote diverse and realistic standards of beauty. Decreasing social media content has many positive mental health benefits and nearly everyone who does so reports an increased outlook on life.
3. Focus on Self-Care: Engage in activities that make you feel good about yourself. This might include exercising, which can boost your mood, practicing mindfulness, or indulging in hobbies that you enjoy. Self-care can improve your overall well-being and help you see yourself in a more positive light.
4. Seek Professional Help: Talking to a therapist can be incredibly beneficial. They can help you work through your feelings and develop healthier ways of thinking about yourself. If depression is a significant factor, professional treatment can also address the root cause of your negative self-perception.
5. Surround Yourself with Positivity: Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself. Positive relationships can reinforce your worth and help counteract negative self-perceptions.

Feeling unattractive is a painful experience that can be deeply intertwined with depression. However, it’s important to recognize that these feelings are not an accurate reflection of reality. We can’t, by definition, all be less attractive than average but also – there are genuinely more important things to concentrate on in life. By challenging negative thoughts, limiting exposure to harmful media, focusing on self-care, seeking professional help, and surrounding yourself with positive influences, you can begin to shift your perception and see yourself in a more positive light. Remember, beauty is not just about physical appearance; it encompasses your personality, kindness, and the unique qualities that make you who you are.

Why does everything I touch turn to shit?

Why is everything always like this?

Why can’t I be normal like everyone else?

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If you are asking these questions, you are not alone. Many folks feel the same way. In fact, search engines are asked ‘why am I such a fuck up’ thousands of times a month. We can’t all be as screwed up as we feel like we are, can we? If you’ve come here then you’ve probably searched online just like a hundred other people have today. This article will talk about some of the reasons why we think the way we do, and how to feel better about ourselves and offer some hope. When you’re done reading, considering going into the forum area where you can also find our live chat. Sometimes just being around other people who understand how you’re feeling is enough to keep going for another day. 

Life can be a meat grinder from day one. How we deal with life is often dictated by what happens to us as children. The things parents, teachers and other authority figures say and do get “locked” into our brains. For example, a parent says, “I wish you had never been born”, or “you’ll never amount to anything”. These hurtful words become like recordings that play in our minds over our lifetime and affect the choices we make. Of course physical and sexual abuse scar us also in horrible ways (I am a victim of childhood sexual abuse). I spent most of my life thinking I wasn’t good enough, that I was bad and ugly and useless.

It has taken many years of therapy to take down those recordings of abuse that played in my mind for so many years. That is the way out of these negative thought patterns. One technique of fighting these messages that my therapist taught is positive affirmations. The way affirmations work is pretty simple but requires patience and practice. One of my early ones was “I am beautiful and worthy.” It was hard to say, but I kept at it. This might feel silly at first but again, you have to keep at it for it to work. 

Here are some affirmations to get you started. You don’t need to pick many. Just choose one or two to get started:

• I am a strong, capable person
• I have done difficult things in the past, and I can do them again
• I have experienced challenges in the past, and I am more resilient because of this
• I am allowed to feel upset, angry, and sad sometimes—that’s part of being human
• My personal boundaries are important and I’m allowed to express my needs to others
• “No” is a complete sentence and I don’t have to explain or justify my boundaries
• I am allowed to feel good and to experience pleasure in life
• I am worthy of receiving good things and of accomplishing my goals in life
• The past is the past, and my past doesn’t predict my future
• I forgive myself for mistakes I made and I refuse to hold them against myself

I posted mine on my bathroom mirror, so I would have it in view several times a day. Another place would be the fridge. You can also use your phone to store and set reminders.

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Another area to be aware of is what is called cognitive distortions. This is a fancy word for the things that go through our minds that cause us to be unhappy in life. My therapist and other mental health professions educated me on these concepts and they were a life changer. Becoming aware of what I was thinking was the first step. I used journaling quite often to increase my awareness of my thought patterns.

Knowing the problem is the first step to fixing it. The following list, taken from an article by Harvard Medical School is a good place to start. 

Once you are aware of cognitive distortions in your thinking, you can combat them. One method is to write out a “camera check” of an event that is causing you difficulty. One one column, write what you believe is happening, then in the other column try and look logically at the situation as if you were a third person observer. I ferreted out many of these distortions in my thinking over the years and am still working on it.

• Black-and-white (or all-or-nothing) thinking: I never have anything interesting to say.
• Jumping to conclusions (or mind-reading): The doctor is going to tell me I have cancer.
• Personalization: Our team lost because of me.
• Should-ing and must-ing (using language that is self-critical that puts a lot of pressure on you): I should be losing weight.
• Mental filter (focusing on the negative, such as the one aspect of a health change which you didn’t do well): I am terrible at getting enough sleep.
• Overgeneralization: I’ll never find a partner.
• Magnification and minimization (magnifying the negative, minimizing the positive): It was just one healthy meal.
• Fortune-telling: My cholesterol is going to be sky-high.
• Comparison (comparing just one part of your performance or situation to another’s, which you don’t really know, so that it makes you appear in a negative light): All of my coworkers are happier than me.
• Catastrophizing (combination of fortune-telling and all-or-nothing thinking; blowing things out of proportion): This spot on my skin is probably skin cancer; I’ll be dead soon.
• Labeling: I’m just not a healthy person.
• Disqualifying the positive: I answered that well, but it was a lucky guess.

For more information on cognitive distortions, check out this article by Harvard Medical.

You are not a failure. Liffe has handed you some difficult things and your mind has done what it could to cope. You can feel better. You can have hope.

Sometimes that may mean going to see a licensed therapist or getting a prescription for antidepressants. If you are hesitant to try drugs or you want to see if you can tackle depression through natural methods, then you have the opportunity to do so because there are many steps that you can try that don’t involve medication. However, we must emphasize that if you are currently taking medication, you should not suddenly stop taking it without first speaking to your medical provider.

Let’s talk about some of the most effective tips to overcome your depression naturally.

1. Stay in Touch

If you are feeling down and you are not sure where to turn, then consider going to family and friends. You don’t necessarily have to admit all of your depressive feelings to them, but by spending time with people that you love and appreciate, you can feel better overall.

Sometimes we just need a reminder that there are people who care about us, and by getting out there and doing something you enjoy, some of your troubles may begin to melt away.

2. Consider Relocating

Sometimes our feelings of depression are not because of a particular issue or person. Instead, it could be where you live that is making your situation worse. You may have been born in a specific place, but it doesn’t mean that you were meant to live there forever, especially if you aren’t happy. There can be many aspects of your town that may cause your anxiety, from constant noise of a fast-paced city to a lack of activity in small towns. Maybe the people that live there are causing you pain or triggering you in some way.

A move to a healthier environment may be the key. Some of the best places to live for your mental health include the suburbs or areas near a lake, where things are just a bit more relaxed, and you can be with your thoughts. If you think moving might be a good idea, but you need to be sure, then consider taking a long vacation and see if your negative feelings dissipate. If you’re already feeling terrible you don’t have anything to lose.

3. Exercise is Key

When we are depressed, we tend to want to lay under our covers and shield ourselves from the world, but in reality, getting up and exercising could be the answer. It has been proven that exercise can help to treat the symptoms of depression because activity can distract us from our thoughts. On top of that, when we feel and look better, we can also see a rise in our self-esteem. Finally, when we exercise, a chemical reaction takes place as our body releases endorphins that interact with the receptors in our brain which reduce our feelings of pain.

While this internal change may be a temporary feeling, 20 minutes of exercise every morning, combined with the other tips on this list, can give you the boost that you need.

4. Eat Right

While exercise is a major key to wellness, so is a healthy diet. Sometimes, if we eat a lot of bad foods, we start to feel sluggish and uninspired, and those feelings can quickly spiral out of control. Also, some people find comfort in food and become upset when they gain weight. To fight off these feelings, try to consume a healthy diet that consists of fruit, vegetables, whole grains, and protein. All of these foods will make you feel satisfied and energized without filling you with empty calories.

Also, try not to drink too much alcohol. If you get a buzz from drinking, you’ll soon realize that it is only temporary. If you drink often, you will actually feel more depressed and unfulfilled.

5. Set Goals

Sometimes we can feel upset in the now because we don’t believe that there is a better tomorrow — so one way to remedy these feelings is to create goals that you hope to accomplish in the future. Your goal can include anything from getting a new job to enrolling in school but make it realistic and something that you can work towards. When you have a plan for tomorrow, then you may suddenly wake up every morning with a feeling of purpose, and this newfound meaning in your life might be exactly what you may have been missing.

6. Talk to a Therapist

If you have done all your research and tried everything, but you still feel depressed, then it may be time to talk to a therapist. You don’t have to commit to anything. This is just a chance for you to speak your feelings and see what the expert recommends. That could be anything from breathing exercises to journaling your thoughts every night. Remember that there is nothing wrong with going to a psychiatrist. Many people have weekly meetings just so they can talk to someone and keep their feelings in check.

As you can see, there are many natural methods that can help you to overcome your depression naturally. You don’t have to try them all at once but consider doing what you can and see if you feel better. No matter what happens, remember that you are a unique and special person, and you deserve happiness.

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It can feel impossible to face the challenges of daily life when all you feel is nothing, or too much at once to process. You may even be feeling these polarities at once, which can be intense and confusing, and can make you feel like you are going crazy at times. Numbness and sensory overload are fraternal twin acquaintances that contribute to these identical spectrums of pain and suffering.

The worse suicidal thoughts become over time, the worse we feel – and the harder it becomes to know what to do to stop it all. Things become scary. It’s easy to feel out of control, or like you are spiraling into an abyss at a speed you cannot easily regain control over.

Society still stigmatizes mental health to the point that it often remains uncomfortable to talk to your family and friends about your feelings and state of mind. Unfortunately, some people don’t know how to react, and the subject makes them feel uncomfortable. Most people don’t want to face their own mortality, or the concept of death; so they struggle with the idea of a loved one experiencing a close relationship with mortality.

When important concepts like suicide are stigmatized, tension and stress remain heightened, and relief is regularly delayed, or non-existent.

So, what are we to do when we feel consumed by suicidal ideation?

Finding Light in the Darkness

While it may seem impossible that we can retrace our steps and find a way out of the grips of darkness, it is not. It’s also not something that magically happens overnight, and there certainly isn’t a potion we can drink to make all of our pain and problems go away.

As a start, let’s try to consider the idea that we aren’t fond of the thoughts that are causing us so much pain. Those same thought patterns convince us that we cannot change, and that things will always be this way. But, they truly don’t have to be.

We don’t have to believe what those thoughts tell us. In essence, thoughts are things. We can learn to choose to replace/recycle/remodel the things we identify as root causes of thoughts that plague us. Suicidal ideation consumes your focus and energy, and can drain you of all hope, but hope can be restored over time with effective support and resources.

I would like to share with you, an idea that helped reshape my framework for living.

Your mindset yields your thoughts,
Your thoughts yield your beliefs,
Your beliefs yield your actions,
Your actions yield your habits,
Your habits yield your results.

This is not to say that you are the cause of your suicidal ideation.

In fact, there are unconscious processes that control our mental processes. Think of this concept as an iceberg: 90 percent of our decisions and actions occur unconsciously, and 10 percent, on a conscious level. That means that it’s possible for us to think we have more control than we often do over our thoughts and decisions, but they are actually being influenced by experiences, memories, and other various factors.

It may not feel possible to change or take control of your thoughts, but it is a habit that can be formed with time and support. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) can help change coping habits by reframing thought processes, and creating a more supportive mental foundation. This can truly bring welcome relief into your life, and hope of continuing to get better.

What if It Feels Impossible to Stop Feeling Suicidal?

Suicidal ideation unfortunately doesn’t come with a light switch that we can flip on or off, but it can be rewired little by little over time. It doesn’t matter how many weeks, months, or years it takes to feel better. How long it takes to find relief is no measure of your strength or abilities, and everyone heals differently.

Life can be sometimes pictured be like a game. We navigate the days using the tools given to us, and some levels may seem too difficult to move past. If we fail to ‘level-up’ at times, we still acquire insight and experience. Changing how we perceive and value those experiences, has the ability to change how we experience life.

Everyone is deserving of renewal of hope, and the support of others along the way. Talking may be one of the first or last things you feel like doing, but it is one of the first steps along the path to feeling better. Who you decide you talk to is completely up to you.

If you like the idea of talking in a safe space amongst internet strangers, SF is a community of empathetic individuals that share the experience of suicidal ideation. Life can feel a little easier when you are reminded that you aren’t alone, and you never are on this forum.

What are YOU doing TODAY to make Tomorrow Better?

If NOTHING, then do not be disappointed when tomorrow is not better…..

I put it on my signature line though not so much as a reminder to people I reply to – but mostly as a reminder to myself- my own mantra of sorts- about how to keep going when things get bad. It is misunderstood mostly because it is applied incorrectly. I get a lot of questions asking how it can be applied in their situation because there are not answers in their situation and things can’t change.  All it is really saying is that every day is a chance to make something better for tomorrow.

I do not believe things get better spontaneously in most instances. The longer we wait to start working on a problem the longer it typically takes to find a solution. Problems have a way of getting worse over time and inaction, not better. That said, most people take my question far too seriously and try to apply it to the big problems in life first. Wife left them – what can they do to make that not an issue for them? Failed out of the University and can’t find a job, already applied for 200 jobs, what can they do to get a paycheck next Friday? What can they do today that solves those issues tomorrow?

The brain has a way of spinning things into a dark place of “how can you do something today to make those issues better” and if I can’t or you can’t answer that, then maybe it is okay to give up because we can’t change it anyway so… It often boils down to looking for a reason to stop trying and spending so much effort, to get the okay to stop trying just because the effort of continuing is so much and we are just plain tired.

My Ideas About Life 

I emphasize “my” ideas because I can’t speak for everybody else and I can’t even be sure I am 100% right on everything I think. I just go with what has worked for me over the last few years.

Life is many things. There are the big things like work, family, relationships, health, financial situation etc. that effect everybody in some way or another. The commonality of all of them is they are big things and for the most part all include a great many things well beyond our personal control. We can’t control the economy, or the thoughts and actions of other people, and for the most part we are stuck with whatever health we are in as many of the big issues are the results of decisions made years before (or genetics) that we cannot change now.

This means in a couple sentences we have taken all the “big important” things in life off the table as out of our direct control because the most we can do is influence them- we cannot control the results. They have too many factors where we are at the mercy of fate/ other people/ luck/god- choose for yourself- but it is not all us, and not just our choices and decisions. Even the parts that are “us” often have components from the decisions of many years before that we can no longer change, so at this point in time with “What can we do today to make tomorrow better” it may be pretty hard to pick something that will have a direct and certain (much less immediate) effect.

I have a lot of health issues. I cannot cure them/fix them and they affect so many facets of life – virtually everything I do. I also have money issues like many people, real employment is not an option due to health, I lost a 6 figure income job due to physical health just as my kids were starting in university, I sometimes have family problems, basically no friends except a few online since I stopped working near 10 years ago, all I have is immediate family that even talk to me, chronic intense pain, and I could go on with the list. Many reading this have similar issues, and many more as well. This is the same list that had me searching for suicide methods 8 or 9 years ago when I found this site, and in all that time the big issues have not changed substantially. But things are much better now than they used to be, why?

People often try to compare their issues with somebody else’s, and both come away thinking something different about who is worse off. The reality is it doesn’t matter because we have to live our own lives, and the problems other people are dealing with do not make our lives better or worse. The problems other people have do not change our life. Just because they may have something “worse”, our life is not improved in any way, and we do not feel better because they have cancer and we do not. We also have to remember in the same way, the successes of other people do not make our lives worse.

Somebody else being happily married, having 2 luxury cars, a boat, and high paying job has no effect on our lives. The first place where many people make themselves miserable is while being very quick to agree that somebody else having bigger problems does nothing make their own problems better, they refuse to see that somebody else’s successes do not make their life worse. The only thing that can really affect our own life is the way we feel and react to our own life. 

What is your life really? Is it politics and the economy and the laws and regulations and statistics of wealth and ownership and debt and all the other things we see on the news? Or is our life what we do when we get up, what we do in the day, in the afternoon, in the evening, and at night? Is it what the average dinner out costs in a large metropolitan area or is it what we have to eat right now for breakfast? I believe our life is really far more about our satisfaction or contentment about ourselves in any given moment or period of time. If there are a lot of good moments throughout the day, it is overall a good day. If there are not a lot (or none) it is a bad day.

What I Have Learned About Depression

I can directly change the way I feel tomorrow morning when I walk into the kitchen to make coffee by doing the dishes and picking up tonight before I go to bed. If my kitchen is nice and clean and smells good, if I can start the coffee and hear the birds out my windows at the bird feeder then my life can be actually okay for that few minutes in the morning- peaceful and relaxing- better because I did the dishes and picked up last night, and fed the birds yesterday.

If when I get up I have to make room in the sink to try to wash out a cup for my coffee while the smell of half sour milk from around the drain is all I notice, then I have to fill the coffee pot with water before I can make coffee, and clear off a place on table before I can even set my coffee cup down my morning is many things- but it is not nice or relaxing. It becomes just another indicator of the worthlessness of my life.

Pretty specific example I know, because that is what depression and trying to learn to adjust was for me. I felt like there was no point in the little things because the big problems were always there, and there was nothing I could do about them. I did not bother shaving, getting dressed, or doing more than the most basic chores around the house- none of it mattered anyway. I was still sick, could not work, was losing so much financially after I got sick, etc. etc. Who has time to care about the little things when all these big real problems need fixing?

Then at some point I cleaned up the kitchen and got things sorted out because I had a health worker stopping by in the morning and I somehow managed to decide I still had some small pride and did not want them to think I was a slob on top of everything else. The next morning I got up and it was nice. The person called and cancelled appointment so never showed up, but the morning coffee was nice. For the first time in over a year there was an hour or two of day that was almost okay. I did not feel better health wise, and none of the financial issues or any problems were dealt with, but I found something I could improve and had done it. So I started trying to do that as often as I could.

I started looking for things I could do to make things a little easier or better. Where I stored my medications, moving bird feeders to where I could see them, just lots and lots of little things. There are so many big problems that I could not change, but by spending more effort on a lot of little things I started adding a few good hours to my day to help offset the many bad ones. As I had more good hours and things felt okay sometimes, then I also found I could do more real work towards the “big things.”

After a while I could concentrate enough to take an online class to learn about digital media and graphics and I got some small freelance jobs that make a little extra money helping out with the financial issues for example. It also gave me more things to do during the day so I was not just staring at walls with my thoughts spinning out of control.

“What we can do today to make tomorrow better” is not always going to be find a job, or even send out 10 job applications- though either one of those might be something. It is anything we can do that will make any moment of tomorrow just a tiny bit better than it was today. The very small little things work to make tomorrow better also. When it feels like virtually everything in our lives is worthless or a problem, there are a ton of things to fix. But after a year, 300 little things being made better all add up, and suddenly tomorrow is a LOT better. 

Life, happiness, peace, and contentment do not depend on just the big things that we don’t have, it is also being able to “smell the roses” and find pleasure and joy or relax in the moment. When all the little things get better or start getting better, then there is energy to really try on the big things. Depression can be so overwhelming that it makes success at the big things nearly impossible, but with the ability to enjoy some small things sometimes we can push back the depression, and make a meaningful effort on the big things again.

I know it all sounds like “just deal with it and be happy anyway.” A more colorful and sarcastic expression “when life gives you a shit sandwich are you supposed to be grateful you are not starving?” No, that is not what I am saying. It is more like I feel like having prime rib, but I am not going to decide to go hungry if all they have is roast chicken. I sincerely believe life is less about what you have and more about what you think about it and if you are able to resist reacting in a manner out of proportion to the issues.  

Forgone Conclusions and Self Fulfilling Prophesies

It is very easy to make small problems bigger and big problems insurmountable. People do it all the time, myself included. It comes from the natural aversion to things that are difficult and/or that may result in failure. By making problems bigger in our minds we give ourselves permission to simply not try at all or to avoid the risk of failing. If somebody has failed at a number of things then it is even more alluring to both avoid the effort of trying and avoid failing. The simple truth is it provides two positives in the short term for what is only a hoped for benefit in the long term. Given that seemingly logical equation, when we are suffering from depression it makes the choice seem obvious.

The reality is that while it saves some effort and the risk of failure, it also make success impossible. The answer to that in the depressed mind is even if it did work out then it would not last anyway. Then with the now insurmountable problems firmly established in our minds plus the “fact” that it will not stay good even if it did work, we are not going to work on big problems or issues but simply use them as excuses, and since we cannot fix the now big problems there is no point in doing the small things either as nothing will ever make life “good”. In deciding that we do in fact ensure that everything in our life is bad. It also makes us know on some level by not having tried that we have failed yet again, compounding the original fears.

There are in fact some situations that cannot be changed, or that are hopeless to continue to put effort into. If somebody has died they are gone, some medical or physical health situations are beyond hope, there are even some mental health issues that have no complete cure as of yet, and a break-up or divorce may well be final. We need to face the reality that all of these things, while having no full solution, are also relatively common place and do not prevent millions of other people from having a decent quality of life. It is a matter of not allowing our reaction to a situation or even combination of situations to dictate every aspect of our life.

There are always places where you can make life better. They do not have to be big things. Maybe the answers do not even exist to all the big things. But the hours in your day are filled with a lot of small things, and finding ways to make those small things meaningful gives life value. You cannot appreciate the smaller things if all the time all your focus is on the big problems or on the things you do not have. But there are ways to make the small things better which in turn makes the hours in the morning, during the day, and through your evenings better. When some things start to get better it becomes easier to either accept the things you cannot change, or to find energy and ability to change those that you can (even if they require a lot of effort).

If every day you put in the effort to make even one small thing better for the next day, then over time things do improve. When a year has passed and 350+ things in your life are better it is hard to feel like there is nothing good in your life. In fact, you start to feel like life may have problems, but it is worth it. Just by using today to make something better for tomorrow.

If you’d like to start doing something today, come join our community here.

Dwelling on the Negative

Psychologists refer to dwelling on negative things, in the past or present, as ‘ruminating’. Susan Nolen-Hoeksema at Yale University conducted numerous studies on ruminating and discovered, perhaps unsurprisingly, that people who persistently focus on negative things are far more likely to become and remain depressed. It sounds obvious when laid out that way; how can dwelling on the negative not lead to depression and misery?

Unfortunately, over the years, the media has popularised the idea that the only way to deal with events in the past that have had a negative impact on our lives is to talk about them. Talk therapy and psychotherapies are predicated on the idea that digging into our past can explain our present problems and emotions, which can certainly be true if you have an unexplained issue or emotional problem. This does not, however, mean that talking about the past can resolve those issues or emotional problems; there is a world of difference between identifying a trigger from the past and dwelling on the events that caused the trigger.

Dwelling on the negative things that happened to us only serves to prevent us from moving forward into the future. They become excuses and ‘reasons’ not to make steps in the present to correct issues in our lives and, more importantly, reliving distressing or traumatic events in the past over and over again in our heads reopens the wound time and time again, making it impossible to start to heal.

Rose Tinted Nostalgia

Conversely, for many adults the past was a simpler and happier time. As we get older, often our friendships become more difficult to maintain and making new friendships seems to border on the impossible. For those that did not find a partner early in life or who do not have a family around them, memories of the past can be extremely enticing. Reminding ourselves of a time when we felt carefree and had an abundance of friends before people paired up and settled down, or thinking of a time we used to be successful in our careers before becoming sick or entering a period of unemployment can remind us that we are capable of living a life that held happiness or meaning.

It is difficult to accept that life changes – especially when those changes leave us feeling lonely or unfulfilled. Nostalgic memories of happier times are one thing, but when this turns to self recrimination for ‘allowing’ our lives to get off track or bitterness and anger about whatever it is that we feel derailed things, thinking about past happiness becomes just as dangerous as thinking about past trauma.

Leaving the Past in the Past

Many people do not realise that it is possible to stop thinking about the past. They will insist that they cannot stop the thoughts that pop into their head and are unable to prevent the periods of rumination that bring them down and stop them from moving toward a happier and healthier future.

It is very difficult to stop thoughts from popping into your head. It is, however, entirely possible to prevent yourself from dwelling on those thoughts or giving them space in your head. Acknowledging that you get to choose what you spend your time focussing on is the first step, after understanding how dwelling on the past is damaging you, to healing in the present.

When thoughts of the past pop into your head, consider the following:

Have I thought about this before? Did thinking about it then resolve anything in my present? If the answer is no, then thinking about the past could well be damaging and engaging in something to distract yourself from your thoughts instead. Make a list of activities you can do that do not involve thinking about the past and have this on hand.

Is there a current problem that needs to be resolved? If there is a current issue or problem, instead of dwelling on the things in the past that led to the difficulties you are experiencing, get into problem solving mode instead. Make positive plans to deal with the problem or seek help from professionals offering Cognitive Behavioural Therapies to help with adjusting your mind-set and finding solutions to current issues. CBT is proven to be extremely effective for helping people reclaim their present from problems and issues caused by past events, without spending excessive time discussing them.

Will thinking about this change what happened? The answer is, assuredly, a solid no. Accepting the bad things that happened in the past or the things that changed our lives in negative ways to create our current future is a powerful tool. Practising self compassion and treating ourselves with kindness and respect goes a long way to helping us move forward. If you would not constantly remind someone you care about of traumatic and terrible things that happened to them in the past, or bring up perceived mistakes again and again, you should not do this to yourself either. You are as deserving of care, protection and compassion as anyone else.

The past has only as much power as we choose to give it. It is not easy and it takes effort but the reward is the future you are giving yourself by leaving the past where it belongs. You have the power to choose – choose to reclaim your present and stop letting the past steal your future. If you feel like you need help and support, join our forums and chat rooms and find other people facing the same problems and struggles; we are stronger together.

The longer a person dwells on failures and difficult times, the deeper they fall into a depressive state, until sometimes they may not even want to come out of it. This is where they subconsciously want to stay, where they feel comfortable and sometimes they start to believe they belong in this state- all alone, in self-destruction mode trying to make the reality of their world look like the way they feel inside.

There is no antidote for depression.  While sometimes it is possible to recover spontaneously on their own given time, in most cases it requires intervention and assistance by friends or loved ones at a minimum and most often professional help such as counseling or medication.  From a personal perspective, they need to:

1. Listen to the pain they are suffering from, recognizing it is real and valid.
2. Ask themselves why they are depressed and try to understand it themselves.
3. Understand it is not their fault.
4. Try to figure out what or when it all started to be able to address the issues that caused the depression.

Many times the help of a counselor is required to find the real though less obvious answers to these things. Answers like “because my life sucks” are not real answers, specifics are needed. More to the point, even a specific answer may not be the “real answer” because the way depression works is to alter our reaction to things. Things in life may or may not be bad, but the depression is caused by the reaction a person has had to things going badly (or even going well in some cases, if that includes a fear of losing what they have or of things getting worse again).

If you do want to try to coach yourself out of depression on your own, there are some things to try. They are not automatics that make everything better, and they absolutely are not an instant cure. In fact, when dealing with depression they can sometimes be nearly impossible to do, but putting forth the effort to continue doing them can lead to good results for some.

1# Gratitude & Seeing the Good

If you are suffering from depression, you will have to force yourself to accept good things and count your blessings for what you have got in life. You may not feel appreciative of what you have and it almost certainly feels like there is nothing good or worthwhile, but the fact you are reading a computer screen or mobile device to see this is ample evidence that not everything in your world is gone. It may be health, it may be family, it may be a pet, or perhaps it is just the fact that you have a warm dry place to sit at the moment, but look for and learn to recognize the good.

You need to allow for the fact that no, not everything is horrible. You also need to see good things for other people as being good- not something to be jealous of or to cause further pain. Until you can admit to yourself and realize that there are still a lot of good things in the world you will never be able to find “hope” which is needed to defeat depression.  You need to develop the habit of offering thanks for the many things you already have and accept the kindness that people offer as opposed to bemoaning what id too little or not enough.

Sound hard or nearly impossible? That is because when suffering from depression this type of thing is nearly impossible. Remember from above, depression is less about the way a person feels and more about the way they react to things. The reaction is caused by the depression and so long as battling depression reacting in a positive way is going to be very difficult. Just recognizing that you should react differently or be able to do this is a great first step.

2# Taking good care of yourself:

Maintaining a healthy lifestyle is another thing you can do to fight depression. Daily exercise, proper diet, and sound sleep can result in a more positive state of mind. Get into a routine and try to follow it always, but it is especially important to follow the routine on the bad days (when it is hardest to even get out of bed or move).

Adults should have 7-9 hours of sleep at night. You should do exercises or yoga for 30 minutes to one hour each day. Regular aerobic and anaerobic exercise will result in the best condition to improve mental health. Walking and meditation can rejuvenate energy. Better food choices that are home-made for a healthy diet is imperative. Diet and exercise cause a multitude of positive changes within the body and mind that can both help to prevent a return to depression as well as offer need strength to come out of depression. You can start a healthier life style any day- at any time.

3# Social interaction:

When you are feeling depressed and want to spend all your time alone,  that is when it is most important to socialize with family, friends, classmates or workmates, or even just be around places with lots of people so you are not physically alone. When you are alone the negative thoughts always build and deepen. Listening to sad music because you feel like it “fits your mood” is in reality intentionally adding to your depression.  If you feel disconnected, connect yourself again by being around people and involved in life. It will seem impossible or like punishing yourself to spend time with people instead of alone by yourself, but that is how you remain connected to the world and to your life.

Intentionally isolating from everybody and everything, then claiming that nobody cares or pays attention to you and your needs is a classic hallmark of depression. Unfortunately, suffering from depression does not relive us of all social responsibility. It is our own responsibility to stay out in the world and participating in it if we want to feel like we are in fact wanted and accepted. This is perhaps the most difficult thing to do if trying to treat depression on your own but is also essential.

4# Hobbies and constructive use of time

An easy way to help depression is by making better use of free time with things like reading books, playing musical instruments, art, painting, indulging in games, etc. These kinds of interests can help with socializing with other people as well as prevent time that would be spent dwelling on problems or dealing with racing thoughts. Free time spent with inactivity often increases depression. By keeping both mind and body active you lessen the amount of time spent suffering from feelings of despair as well.

Aside from just keeping the mind and body active, things like volunteering with charitable organizations, helping others even if it is just family or friends and neighbors helps make you feel wanted or needed and like you are contributing to the life of others. This helps to repel the thoughts of being a burden and useless. Receiving recognition and thanks from helping others fosters higher self-esteem and a higher sense of personal value, all crucial to defeating depression.

Using the time for self-help is also beneficial whether through reading self-help books and motivational material, or through actual actions to improve your life or situation. Cleaning the house and making needed repairs improves both mood and actual situation. If dealing with financial issues then getting a part time job or following money saving techniques like couponing and bargain hunting allow you to earn or save money while staying busy plus the added benefit of giving you feelings of empowerment.

5# Cognitive restructuring:

An essential part of how you feel is what you are thinking in your mind. What you say to yourself has a strong effect on your feelings and self-perceptions. The things you believe to be true tend to materialize as a reality, so negative thoughts tend to result in negative outcomes. Strongly held convictions about whether you are a good person, or what other people think about you can alter your perception from reality.

When dealing with depression, people tend to increase their negative beliefs and thought processes. Even if they are aware they are being negative, they are unable to act or respond to things in a more positive manner. It takes a conscious effort to respond to the world around you in a positive or even neutral manner while dealing with depression. Responding with positivity or at least neutrality is not “faking it” or “putting on a fake smile”. It id the conscious realization that the negative feelings are a reaction being caused by a chemical shift in the brain and the conscious choice to instead treat things in an objective or positive manner.

Cognitive restructuring is a primary aim of cognitive behavior therapy. While CBT is practiced with a therapist or counselor, it is also possible to try to follow its principles on your own. The goal is to identify your negative thoughts or perceptions and then to replace these thoughts or perceptions with more positive or balanced thoughts based on realism as opposed to a negative perception.  Cognitive behavioral therapy works well in treating depression, and applying the principles of it can be done on your own with training and practice.

Just as trained therapists can guide somebody with depression into better and healthier thought patterns, an individual that is willing to honestly assess their situation and thought processes can identify negative or self-defeating thought patterns and replace them with healthier ones.

Is Going it Alone the Right Approach?

When dealing with depression, it is always easier to face it and defeat it with the help of others- friends, family, support groups, etc. If you are determined to try to do it on your own, the above methods make a good approach to individual or self-treatment. The fact that many of them may seem impossible to you while depressed is simply testimony of why it is typically recommended to not try to do it all by yourself and to get help from others.

Self-discipline, motivation, and self-esteem all take a huge hit from depression making it just too difficult to identify what are actually  negative perceptions and negative thought processes from reality. People substitute “cannot” for ‘do not want to” or “do not feel like” and convince themselves of the impossibility of the situation. If you are able to force yourself “to do” even when you do not want to or do not feel like it, then it is in fact possible to self-recover from depression. If you are unable to muster that level of willpower, you will likely need help in recovery.

Clara Decker is an expert small business consultant, free time writer and full-time internet surfer. She likes to work on making in-home life better in society. She lives like an entrepreneur to support her husband at the month ends.

Sleep is a basic human need. It’s essential for us to function and perform better, to prevent illnesses, to recover from illnesses, and so much more. Not having enough sleep can lead to many problems, including anxiety. However, stress can also cause sleeping difficulties.

Anxiety is a feeling of worry, fear, and nervousness. It affects how one acts and performs, mostly in a negative way. Often, if not all the time, anxiety and sleep deprivation feed off each other. Stress can cause sleep deprivation, or sleep deprivation can cause you to have anxiety. Either way, it’s a vicious and challenging cycle.

Fortunately, it’s not an impossible situation. There are ways you can help you get out of the cycle. To learn how to get more sleep despite anxiety, try the following tips:

#1 Positive Thinking Therapy

There’s this new therapy for insomnia that is positive thinking which might work for the same for anxiety. It’s changing all your negative thoughts about sleep into positive thoughts. For instance, instead of saying “I can’t fall asleep,” say “I will be able to sleep well tonight.” If you say “I’m not going to sleep well because of this,” change it to “I can do this, and I will be able to sleep soundly tonight.” Simply put, it’s the law of attraction in practice.

It may seem like a long shot but the mind is quite a mysterious thing, and this therapy has worked for many. Negative thinking won’t help with the anxiety. Thus it won’t help with your sleep deprivation either. Try it out!

#2 Inhale, Exhale

When you begin to feel anxious, one of the first things you’re told to do is to breathe. So take a moment to stop what you’re doing, and focus on your breathing. Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale, and repeat until you feel calm. Focused breathing helps calm the nerves and the mind, thus reducing the stress. Then, the more relaxed you feel, the easier it will be to fall asleep.

#3 Try Yoga

In general, exercise will help you sleep better. However, yoga is also calming and helps you focus on your breathing and your movements. It helps you be more control of your mind. Yoga will contribute to reducing the stress you feel from anxiety, therefore helping you get your much-needed sleep.

#4 Invest in your mattress and pillows

Your mattress and pillows can make or break your sleep. You should take time to select the perfect ones for you because it will be with you for years to come. Ideally, get a mattress and pillow that suits your sleep position. It should support a natural curvature of your spine; prevent any pressure points, while still being comfortable.

It’s easier to find a mattress for back sleepers. For side sleepers, you will need more pressure relief. Thus, a mattress topper for side sleepers is a standard addition to the bed. Pillows also require attention and detail. They also need to support a natural head, neck, and spine alignment.

#5 Have a Thinking Time before Hitting the Bed

A thinking time before hitting the bed is to identify what’s bothering you or causing you to be anxious. Think about what is worrying you; write it down along with some solutions. If you don’t address them, your mind will keep thinking about it and will rob you of sleep. One way you can address your anxiety is by creating a to-do list for the next day or week.

#6 Limit Caffeine Intake

Limit caffeine intake especially in the afternoon, so you will not have a hard time sleeping at night. You should also avoid alcohol, big meals, and food that take longer to digest before bedtime. Instead, have a warm cup of milk about an hour before bedtime to help you fall asleep.

#7 Put Your Phone Down

In dimming your lights, you should also turn off all your TV, cell phones, and tablets. Apparently, the light from your phone affects your sleepiness. Plus, having your phone is just a terrible idea because it’ll keep you scrolling and scrolling, robbing you of sleep. It doesn’t help with anxiety either.

#8 Stick to a Schedule and Follow a Routin

As much as possible, try to go to bed at the same time and wake up at the same time. Thar will eventually create your body clock work better. Also, create a routine that prepares you for bed. The method can include some of the other tips on this list like a thinking time, exercise, etc.

#9 Play Relaxing Music

There’s a reason why babies sleep through lullabies. It’s relaxing. So, play some music, preferably with no words to ease you to sleep. Some sound machines are also helpful in reducing stress levels. Many find that the sound of waves or rain can help them fall asleep.

#10 Let Someone Know

Anxiety should never be faced alone. You need someone to assist you in and hold you accountable. Talking to someone about what’s bothering you helps you release some of the stress. In return, they might give you some help about what you can do. You don’t have to face things alone. If it’s horrible, consider a doctor or therapist even. They might see the need for some medication that will help with the underlying problem.

Wrapping Things Up

Sleep deprivation and anxiety go hand in hand together. Almost always, you can’t have one without the other. It is important that you take measures to address either or both of them. Usually, when you address one, you’re also addressing the other. The most important thing is that you take the first step, which is the most difficult.

By-  Sandra McElroy. “My mission is to help BedtimeFriends readers research, & pick mattresses, pillows & various other sleep products that suit their needs, & budget.”

References:
https://www.verywell.com/how-breathing-exercises-help-with-anxiety-and-insomnia-3015268
https://adaa.org/understanding-anxiety/related-illnesses/sleep-disorders
https://www.everydayhealth.com/sleep/falling-asleep-with-anxiety.aspx

Answers from those dealing with depression

A community project was created from a forum thread  that really struck a tone as being the best real life explanation of what it was like to deal with depression. Volunteers from the SF community read and recorded the descriptions from real people, all over the world, on what it felt like having to live with depression. These recordings were put together  to compile a video that  will help people that do suffer from depression realize they are not alone and people that do not suffer from depression realize depression is a  lot more than just feeling sad.

Answers from the community and  from around the world 

I’ve read about people that compared depression to a black dog that had them by the throat- for me its quicksand that pulls me in and holds me tight, fighting to keep my head above the dirt is exhausting… And it’s relentless.

It is like waves after wave after wave just hitting me, with no space in between. I feel so lost, so hopeless. I have nothing to grab ahold of or someone to offer me a hand.

It is just darkness. Deep and eternal darkness.

It is like I’m drowning. I can’t get enough air to help me breathe. There is no way I can get enough air in my lungs. I try but I can’t breathe I feel like I’m going to die before I draw breath.

A dusty room that smells awful and has mold growing everywhere. That you know you have to touch it to clean it up. But you look around and everywhere there is box after box of junk to sort out first. And you don’t know where to start. Because there’s so much.
Meanwhile the TV is on in the background, muted, and you see everyone else in real life on it, with clean floors going about their life outside. And you feel like you will die in this window covered room.

Like a giant accusing finger poking me in the chest and holding me down.

The monster is fucking real man, and I’m so glad I found a place where people understand me when I say I’m drowning in dirt and tired of the fight.

It’s me. I can’t help but see it this way. He is omnipresent, ostensibly omnipotent, and everything that is undesirable and contemptible–yet I am the disturbance in this “utopia.” With his ever-fixed, incapacitating glare, he is looking down on me. He longs to cut me down. However, he is reluctant–either that or he’s sadistically perpetuating my death. Perhaps either one of us could be speaking.

It is a thick fog, or haze, everything I see visually looks duller and less brilliant, when it gets too much and I have to do something, self-harm clears the haze away, it literally instantly lifts the fog for a minute or so and every color is bright again and I can actually see clearly again.

It’s like a close friend that is toxic to me… When it hugs me it makes me feel down.     When it’s near me… It makes me feel insecure, afraid, and distance… When it talks to me it makes me think the way I shouldn’t… Even when it still does this to me… I still come and play with this “friend” of mine.

The monster of depression feels like it’s just a big chain around my heart that is pulling me down with gravity. Mentally but also physically, I don’t know if it’s just me but when the darkest feelings really hit, my heart actually physically aches. And there’s nothing I can do about it. It’s just a chain with a lock on it and nobody has the key and nobody ever will.

A dark, soul sucking, evil spirit that has followed me for as long as I remember. I can never get rid of it fully.

“My monster” is inside me, sometimes taking over everything inside and pushing the “real me” out and when things are more controlled “I” get more space to be in control. Rereading this, it sounds like I am both out of my mind and body.

Thick approaching darkness and moving shadows. Our spirit, our hope and life and light that is inside, is a little light that grows weaker like a flame.

Depression is a vampire. It sucks the life out of you and turns you into this thing that sucks the life out of others.

Depression is like a twin. As long as I can remember it was always here, next to me. We play, we fight, sometimes the one I win, sometimes the other I. Sometimes I get rid of the twin but I miss I whenever it stays away too long. The depression still is the more creative partner in our team.

It definitely is like waves. Like the tsunami planet in interstellar perhaps. The bit when it is calm and shallow contains confusion and anxiety, and then the tsunami is so powerful and deadly. When I am wiped out by depression and can do nothing except stay in bed (so I get through it without self-harming) it is a bit like being underwater being tossed about and not knowing when I will be able to think straight if ever. But not dying from it. That is the worst. Not dying. When it is that bad. But then the wave begins to subside and it returns to the in between time. Readjusting is hard. Trying to relax between waves. Then I get manic. Which is a horror for those around me. They give me that look of fearful apprehension waiting for the next dive into debilitating depression. It is all so tiring.

I am choking and there is a feeling of emptiness in my chest coming up in my throat and breathing feels difficult.

It’s like that old Batman episode where all the walls, ceiling and floor are closing in all around me as pressures increase…

An uninvited guest, but not one with bad intentions. Like one you accidentally invite in because you felt bad for it and then you regret. Like in the movie, Spirited Away when Chihiro let No-face into the bathhouse. Sometimes Depression becomes volatile and everything it touches turns gray including me. Other times I can make it so submissive it’s like it’s barely even there. But it will never leave me. It is my No-face.

It like quicksand. I’m always fighting it and if I’m calm and cool enough then I’m winning but if I start to lose my shit then it’ll quickly start to crumble and all fall apart pretty fast. Then I’ve got to make my way back out of it again, which is sooo soooo freaking hard. It’s easier to just try to stay on top as much as possible, to keep the calm, and float on the surface, rather than get sucked down. I’ve got to be really careful not to fall down the hole for too long or I’ll stay there and be stuck for who knows how long – weeks, months, and years.

It’s like a cold, dark empty space in the chest where something should be, like you were born with a missing part which belongs in there. The cold empty space is like a black hole that sucks any good or positivity straight away from you and leaves only the cold lonely darkness. It’s never ending and it’s stronger then you and won’t let you hang on to any happiness, if something good happens if you feel positive it will rip those good things away. It’s like it has a mind of its own, it is always watching you and it wants you to hate yourself as much as it hates you, it wants you to die.

There is always a fog, the red river use to help clear the fog, but now it has become just another part of the landscape.

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Any person experiences anxiety before many situations spanning from attending an interview, to taking a test or anything challenging, but anxiety at a higher level is when it interferes with daily routine living and restricts normal living, by causing sleep disorder, or inability to face any situations or with a lack of appetite.

What are the different types of Anxiety?

1: Generalized Anxiety Disorder

The most common type of anxiety is GAD. This is the most prevalent one in the society, affecting tens of millions of people throughout the world.

GAD is symptomized as a continuing state of psychological and/or physiological nervousness and tenseness, usually without a precise cause and with perpetuity.

In other words, if you feel yourself constantly on edge, worried, anxious, or stressed (either physically or mentally) and it’s disrupting your life, you may have generalized anxiety disorder.

2: Social Phobia

This is an unfounded fear of social situations. Shyness in public is a normal phenomenon, but when it stretches to an anxiety that is present in everyday living, while speaking up for the most basic of things, it is a cause for concern.  This leads to an obsessive behavior where one is constantly living with a perpetual fear of being judged. People with social phobia display evasive behaviors. They avoid social gatherings and situations to avoid being judged.

3: Panic Disorder

Panic disorder can be debilitating and causes severe anxiety. This is so severe that it may need hospitalization and treatment. Panic attacks can have symptoms like rapid palpitations, cold flushes after perfuse dizziness and even at times trouble breathing.

There is an eternal sense of doom attached to panic attack and this means that the person experiencing this type anxiety needs to seek medical help.

4: Agoraphobia

The fear of losing control makes the person to just stay indoors and it sets into an anxiety disorder where one cannot step out. Sometimes this is caused after a traumatic event where they have experienced something like an accident or seen a gunfire exchange etc.  That fear manifests itself into a constant need to stay indoors in the blind belief of protection.

Some of the more usual symptoms include:

Fear of socializing that is almost causes an obsession. Severe stress in any environment other than home. Even a basic routing like going to a grocery store causes severe anxiety.

5: Specific Phobias

Some people have a specific anxiety disorder for specific things like closeness of space like claustrophobia, or fear of spiders called arachnophobia. People avoid these situations and can go their entire life without taking any medical treatment.

6: Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

When a human being has been through a very traumatic experience like a near death experience or seen some one die, it causes a lot of posttraumatic anxiety.  This anxiety affects the people going through it when:

• The person relives the traumatic situation- This can mentally and physically transpose them to that point and debilitate them.
• A trigger in that memory – like a noise or a scent can transpose them and create anxiety.
• The fear of the episode recurring

7: Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)

Obsessive-compulsive disorder, or OCD, can be a disparaging disorder. People with OCD often exhibit behaviors that can complicate the lives of themselves as well as the ones around them.

The obsessive behavior is thought based while the compulsive behavior is behavior based.

For example an obsessive behavior is that you feel one may lose the job and the compulsive behavior is to knock of wood every time one thinks about the job.

When these habits become more obsessive that people around them are also

affected, it requires some medical help.

What is Depression?

 Depression is an advanced depressive syndrome, which is very treatable.

Depression symptoms swing from minor to severe and include:

• Feeling a sense of sadness and helplessness leading to a depressed outlook.
• A sudden loss of interest even in things that used to excite a person
• A swing in the eating patterns- either not feeling the interest to tempt the palate or binge eating to keep oneself from thinking
• Insomnia or over sleep.
• A sense of fatigue in everyday life with very little energy
• A feeling of unworthiness and sometimes even guilt
• Difficulty in concentrating and making decisions
• Thoughts of death or suicide

What are the different types of depression?

 Major Depression

When a person is depressed most of the time and all the symptoms, or at least most of them begin to affect their everyday life.  Usually if 3-4 of these symptoms persist it would be termed as major depression.

This type like all other types need medical attention. The common treatment for this would be

Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT)

Repetitive trans cranial magnetic stimulation (rTMS)

The former uses electrical pulses and the latter uses magnetic stimulation to stimulate certain parts of the brain to push it into better activity mode.

Persistent Depressive Disorder

 When a person is suffering for more than a couple of years of depression, it is termed as Persistent Depressive Disorder.

The specific symptoms for this would be

• A severe change in the eating pattern- either eating too much or too little
• Lack of energy and incessant fatigue
• Too much or too little sleep
• A low self esteem with a feeling of hopelessness

The treatment of this type would either be psychotherapy, medications including antidepressants or both.

Bipolar Disorder

 These people who suffer from Bipolar disorder have severe mood swings. They have extreme energy at times and are really happy, and switch to excessive low moods and low self-esteem.

The low depression is treated with anti depressants like other dis orders. The high phase may be treated with Lithium stabilizers to bring down the mood.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

 This is common during the winter months, typically due to lack of sunlight. But goes away once spring comes in.  This is a period of major depression that most often happens during the winter months, when the days grow short and you get less and less sunlight. It typically goes away in the spring and summer.

If you have SAD, antidepressants can help. So can light therapy. You’ll need to sit in front of a special bright light box for about 15-30 minutes each day. One recommended therapy for this disorder is the SAD lamp which emits rays much like the sunlight.

Psychotic Depression

People with psychotic depression are very like major depression along with “psychotic” symptoms, such as- Hallucinations, Delusions, Paranoia.

The treatment includes antidepressant and antipsychotic drugs and ECT therapy.

Peripartum (Postpartum) Depression and Premenstrual Depression. This is a typical depression women go through after pregnancy, or during their regular mensuration cycle. The former is due to the exhaustion and sleepless nights as much as the hormonal changers. This is usually short-lived and with counseling it can be cured. But in server cases it requires some medication.

What are the different forms of treatment for Anxiety and Depression?

 Anxiety disorders and depression are correctable, and a huge margin of people can be assisted with expert attention.

The time duration varies from person to person as does the success rate. Sometimes when people are suffering from more than one disorder there is more of an issue in curing it.

Different methods of therapy is prescribed to the person according to the intensity and the type of anxiety or if it has progressed to a depression.  Some types are:

Cognitive-Behavior Therapy

It centers on recognizing, accepting, and altering thinking and behavior patterns. Benefits take about in 12 to 16 weeks to set in. Patients learn skills and are asked to repeatedly practice them.

Exposure-Therapy

People are exposed in different intensities to objects and situations they are afraid of, and then they begin the situations slowly.  Usually used for phobia related anxiety.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

The person is asked to view situations in different context and accept the decisions and commit to situations.

Dialectical Behavior Therapy

This uses a lot of meditative therapy with other forms to build up acceptance and calmness.

Medication

Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs)- This medication improves the moods of people, while producing lesser side effects. However it has its own set of side effects like sexual dysfunction and insomnia.

The serotonin-norepinephrine reuptake inhibitor, or SNRI, class (venlafaxine and duloxetine) used for general anxiety disorder. It increases the mood in a positive way and Side effects include stomach upset, insomnia, headache, sexual dysfunction, and minor increase in blood pressure.

Benzodiazepines

This class of drugs used only for a short term. Benzodiazepines (alprazolam, clonazepam, diazepam, and lorazepam) are extremely successful in stimulating relaxation and decreasing muscular tension. Long-term use can increase dependence.

Tricyclic Antidepressants

For long term use this is the prescribed medication. (amitriptyline, imipramine, and nortriptyline). Although effective it has a lot of side effects like hypotension, constipation, urinary issues, blurry vision etc.

Transcranial magnetic stimulation

Also called TMS, is non invasive as well as safe. It uses magnetic fields to stimulate the parts of the brain that are slow or non-responsive.

Alternative Therapy

Sometimes other methods like yoga or acupuncture is prescribed to the people for people having modest anxiety and need to handle the stress.

 What is the difference between anxiety and depression?

Even though both anxiety and depression have a lot of commonalities in their symptoms, they are different disorders and have different forms of treatment. It is common for people who are experiencing depression to have some level of anxiety.

Many people who have depression also have a past of an anxiety disorder sometime n life. There is no evidence that one causes the other disorder, there is more evidence to prove that depression is a more compound form of anxiety.

About the Author: Matt Bailey is a noted writer, content marketer and Social Strategist.